A Pens Fan's Reasoning: Why I'm Glad the Flyers Won

"I just hope the news covers the riots in Montreal." -My boyfriend at the end of the 2nd period.

Most of my fellow Pittsburgh Penguins fan friends have allied themselves with the Montreal Canadiens for the duration of this 3rd round series. I have opted to follow the road less traveled and have started... watching... the Philadelphia Flyers a little more closely.

I know, I can't believe it either. It comes down to this: Ron Hextall was a fucking badass and the Flyers haven't been good since the 70s.

Ok maybe it doesn't completely come down to that but here's my attempt to explain exactly where my allegiances lay.

Most importantly, this bears reiteration: I hate the Flyers!!!! But right now, I hate Marion Hossa and the Habs fans way more.

I haven't been following hockey quite that long, only just over a year, so I really have no idea what year the Hawks last made the finals. I know that they lost to the Pens in '92. I know that I called them to win it all this season. I know that with talent like Hossa, Kane and Toews it seems like a no brainer that the Hawks will take the Cup without breaking a sweat when facing players like Pronger, Hartnell and Richards.

But I also know that the last time the Flyers were good, I wasn't even born yet.

I know that I don't agree with how Toews pronounces his name and that the prospect of Hossa losing in the finals 3 years in a row with 3 different teams is too just too tasty for words. How could you not want to see that?

I know that the Flyers were shitty this year. I was pissed when Hartnell bit Letang. I laughed when Stevens got fired, management brought in Laviolette and they got even worse. I gasped for air when the rumors of Carcillo sleeping with Scotty Hartnell's wife bounced off the corners of the internet. I snickered when the Pens embarrassed them in a Home and Home. I ignored them because I didn't care.

But then April rolled around. The Flyers' season rode on their last game against the Rangers, which went into overtime and then to a shoot out. Somehow they won. I was baffled that somehow they won. I texted my Flyers fan friend, knowing he was happy. I shrugged it off and went about life secretly hoping the Flyers would win so the Pens could see them in a later round.

Marty rolled over (literally) in their opening series versus the Devils but the Bruins didn't make life easy on the Flyers. In the end, I chucked it up to luck that the Flyers had made it to the 3rd round. Sometimes fortune favors the foolish and Carcillo is usually pretty foolish.

The Pens lost and being a fan of the sport, I had to make quick work of figuring out a way to keep myself interested through the Cup Finals. I needed to find a team to cheer on to victory. Since the beginning of the season, the Hawks were my personal favorite so I needed to find an underdog: I tried bandwagoning the Sharks but they got swept faster than I could find a website to order a Nabokov shersey. I hated the Flyers but when sizing them up against the Habs' fans, Philadelphia was a close 2nd place.

I started considering what history has been made for the Flyers this season. I thought about Hossa's contract. I was overwhelmed by a feeling of schadenfreude that outweighed my disgust for anyone that wears orange and the answer seemed pretty simple.

Coupling that with the fact that should the Blackhawks actually win, Toews will kick Sidney Crosby out of the "Youngest Captain to ever hoist the Cup" spot. I know its trivial and I know its dumb but if the Pens can't win it this year, I don't want it to effect anything else other than them not winning it this year.

That last paragraph doesn't make much sense but you get my drift.

The Flyers play an older brand of hockey that you don't really see in many other teams. During the regular season, I'd call them thugs who between fights might figure out a way to score but during the playoffs their physicality is unmatched. You put the Broad Street Bullies up against finesse teams like the Bruins or the Canadiens and its obvious who the winner is going to be.

So yes, I can look myself in the mirror and say I am a Pens fan that wants to see her favorite team's arch rival do well. I am able to set my personal biases aside to enjoy my favorite sport before it closes up shop until October.

After all, the greatest thing about playoff hockey is that all the rules are redefined. You never know what's going to be around the corner. You never know what you're gonna get.

Pfft No Habs No

Granted this is a day late and more than a dollar short due to the fact that Game 2 between Les Habitants and The Broadstreet Bullies is going on right now but:

 

Laughing

My

Fucking

Ass

Off

At

Jaroslav

Halak

 

At the beginning of the game, I just wanted to see Carcillo bite off Cammalleri's head and bathe in his blood.  I wanted to see PK Subban get run over and mutilated by Scotty Hartnell.

 

Make no mistake about my loyalties, dear readers, I am a Pens fan through and through.  I hate the Flyers with every fiber of my being.  But, right now, I hate Habs fans so much more... so very much more.  The Flyers are doing everything the Pens didn't do in the last series just by being physical.  The Flyers are doing what they do best, they're bullying the Habs into submission. 

 

Oh and this just in: Game 2, the Habs get shut out AGAIN!  So it's obviously working.

 

Of course, I realize that should the Sharks lose and the Flyers win, I'll be facing the Stanley Cup Final Battle Royal of No One Gives a Shit.  Hossa can't win a cup so I'd have to cheer for the Flyers.  But the Flyers have no business even being in the playoffs (this year or ever) so I''d have to cheer for an original 6 team. 

 

Although...

 

It's kind of a Cinderella story.  The Flyers suck all year, end up winning the deciding game in a shoot out and then go all the way to the cup finals?  ...And win?  I don't know man, I'm a sucker for a good story. 

 

Whatever.  Go Ron Hextall!  I love you!

OLE OLE OLEEEEEEEEE

FEELIN HOT HOT HOT

...more to come sometime later today.

No Pens? Just My Computer

I'm at a loss.

 

Usually whenever I can't think of something to blog about, I blog about the Pens.  Well, the Pens don't really have much going on right now so I find myself completely out of topics.

 

I bought a guitar, that's pretty cool.  I don't know how to play it so that's much less cool.  But my friend, @OMGitsScottP says he'll give me a few lessons so that's really cool.  The Boyfriend showed me a few notes, I've got E and A all worked out.  Mastering something like chords and transitioning between the notes is going to take a little more skill but I stole the Boyfriend's copy of Guitar for Dummies so I'll totally be a pro in no time, right?

 

I have faith that, with this guitar thing, someday I'll be cool.. or really close to faking it.  Until then, I'm just a major nerd with no hope of ever getting laid.

 

Thank God for my Boyfriend.

 

Mercury hass come out of it's Taurus Retrograde and as of today, I'm feeling the effects of it's directness again.  I've gained some emotional clarity and peace over the past 24 hours.  I've recognized the obvious, we'll go from there.

 

The Boyfriend has allowed me to be a total "squatter" at his house for the past month.  It's been great.  I love having someone to come home to after work, someone to wake up to every morning, someone to cook for and cheer sporting events with.  This entire month seems like a dream, I hate the idea of having to wake up from it.  It's crazy to think that only a month and a half/2 months ago we were practically on the verge of breaking up.  I love him so much.  It just seems insane that I'd ever consider giving him up.

 

Of course it helps that he's opened himself up to me immensely since then too.

 

I don't know.  It seems pointless to live anywhere else but in the now.  Planning down the road just doesn't pan out for me.  I told the Boyfriend that he's responsible for planning a suprise for me this weekend since I had one for him last weekend on his birthday.

 

OMG I totally forgot to wish him a Happy 7th Day After His Birthday today.  Gah!  What a lousey girlfriend I am!

OMG its Pens Post Season

I got an anonymous text today:

"I didn't know if u heard but the penguins lost last nt Have a nice day."

When I asked, they told me it was the ghost of penguins past. Dude, I don't have anything against harrassing texts or emails when they're done properly but really? Calling me up and breathing heavy would have been more interesting than that.

I'm not by any means a fair weather fan. I went home after work last night and watched the replay on FSN just to live through each grueling and painful moment with my fellow fans and the objects of our collected fandom. I was sad and depressed and told my boyfriend that it was his fault (I couldn't be mad at anyone in particular so it made sense to be mad at the one person who gets off easiest in my life).

I was distraught. Not even a piece of cheesecake could console me properly. But I stole some of my boyfriend's birthday cake anyway and sat down with a beer. Yes, I mixed marble birthday cake with a Magic Hat No. 9. Judge me, I dare you.

Watching the replay was a twisting knife. It was sad because watching it I knew everything that each one of those players was capable of and I watched them come up short again and again, not because of Halak (and his wonderwoman string of games) but because their heart just wasn't in it.

The skill got the Pens to the playoffs again but their hearts just weren't in the game.

It's sad when you think about Lady Mellon's send off being so similar to her induction: a Pens loss to the Habs.

But in the wake of the Penguins ending their season last night, millions of individual memories that were created in that building are being overlooked. Memories that if you're a regular reader of The Pens Blog, you'll have read and enjoyed and maybe even talked about with other friends.

I think of the Mellon now and its still the Civic Arena to me. It's the huge white magical dome where I sat and saw the Ice Capades and Stars on Ice when I was a kid. It was where Mario and Jagr won their Cups back when I was 11 and 12 years old and just didn't care about hockey. It was where I saw David Copperfield live. Recently, it was where I spent my 2nd date with the Boyfriend to watch the Pens lose to the Carolina Hurricanes last season before beginning a Cinderella run of their own to the Cup finals. It was where I dragged him this season to see Stamkos and Vinny in March then listen to him tell me about how he got a write up for going to a game with his girlfriend when he had called into work.

There really is something magical about that building. It's old fashioned, just made of concrete and steel where the aisle numbers are often written in chalk to help patrons find their correct seats. Through all of its glory and even more through its age, its somehow began to sparkle. There's a gleam that isn't quite sunlight that reflects off of it's shiny white exterior. Magic isn't really the word because magic doesn't really exist.

Does it?

I'd call this post my tribute to Lady Mellon but tribute doesn't do the building justice. A tribute has a sort of sad goodbye connotation and frankly I'm just not ready to put on Sarah Mclaughlin's Angel and cry into my Iron City Light.

I hate that beer.

With my season as a fan coming to a close, I can only look towards next year. I've already started talking about getting tickets for away games. Maybe a Washington or New York or even a Philadelphia hotel will be getting a reservation with my name and credit card attached in the future.

In the meantime, I've forced Gary Roberts to give up his station on my twitter profile and started looking at Bucco game dates to see which ones I can make it to in the near future.

It's going to be a long, long summer.

I Was Too Drunk to Watch the Game

So... the Habs won last night.  Benching Ponikarovsky totally made all the difference, didn't it?

 

:)

 

Honestly, I'm pretty ok with it.  Gill was out, Sid scored a goal.  Spacek was in and... well whatever.  You know, its not easy to take a team that's so "deeply steeped in tradition" seriously when their fans boo some of the best players currently the league.

 

Anyway...

 

Fathead's is a great place to socialize and drink, especially on a Monday Wing Night, but I will not be going back for a game.  EVER.  There's never any seating for a large part, while there are TV's available but they're small and in limited numbers.  When you've been drinking, its impossible to follow the puck on such a small screen.

 

Yes, I'm spoiled.

 

So, all things considered, as soon as Cammelleri scored that first goal, I buried my face in my shot of jager with @OMGitsScottP and @Brian_Metzer and enjoyed my Magic Hat No. 9's in salute to Pascal Dupuis and wasn't heard from again for the rest of the night.

 

Ok that last bit was a total lie but I quit paying attention to hockey.

 

I have to work for Game 7 so I won't be be able to watch the boys bring the pain tomorrow night.  I'm not worried, though.  I work near 3 bridges so I'll just have to pick a number: 6, 7 or 9, if the Pens opt to make it difficult on us fans.

 

On a much more personal note:

 

Dear Pittsburgh Penguins,

 

I work in a hotel.  In said hotel, there is a guest.  This guest checked in with me on Sunday night and told me that he, as a Habs fan, was hoping you'd lose the game on Monday because he had tickets for the game on Wednesday night.  I told him, "Sir, there is NO WAY its going to happen."

 

Well we all know differently now, don't we?

 

So now, he came rolling in just a few minutes ago with a big smile on his face.  "Jennifer, I get to go to the big game tomorrow!"

 

So please, for the Love of Badger Bob, please!  Give me a reason to celebrate when this guy comes strolling back in after the game tomorrow night.

Sidney Crosby: AMG SCORE GOALS WILL YOU?

I'm gonna go ahead and assume that these questions surrounding Sidney Crosby's "drought" were brought up by Capitals fans because you know... if the star isn't scoring goals, the team is totally golfing, right?

Right, Mike Green?

So when asked, as a Pens fan, if am I concerned about Sidney Crosby not scoring a goal the answer is a resounding "No and you're an idiot for thinking I would be." Why? Well basically because of the HMS Hal Gill.

Gill became a household name in Pittsburgh all over again while he held Alexander Ovechkin nearly scoreless in the Canadiens' series over the Capitals last month. Gill's a huge brick wall of awesome. Naturally he's going to have similar magic against Sidney Crosby. Duh.

You Yinzer fans out there that didn't take Hal Gill into account when you started screaming about a sweep in the 2nd round are a bunch of dumbasses and you shouldn't be at all surprised that Sid hasn't scored a goal when Gill's been on the ice for something like 72 of Sid's 98 shifts during this series.

More reasons I'm not worried? Kris Letang and Sergei Gonchar.

While the HMS Hal Gill was busying himself with the best player in the league, the Penguins defensemen, namely Kris Letang and Sergei Gonchar, were busying themselves beating Halak from the blue line.

"I'm not sure its possible but he might be even more handsome with a beard," my boyfriend on Kris Letang.

I'd also like to point out that on Letang's goal last night, Sarge had the 2nd assist. On Sarge's goal, Orpik had the 1st assist. If the Mellon was Twitter, #PensDmen would have been trending.

So all in all, what I'm trying to say is that if the media wants to make a big deal out of Sid not scoring, let them. It'll make it even more huge when he gets a "Sidney Crosby Hat Trick" (a goal, an assist and a save) in the Bell Centre tomorrow night.

Or it'll make it even more amazing when the Habs fall to the Pens, at home, without Canada's Favorite Son scoring a single goal against them.

Aux fans du Canadiens:

Please, please. Please. Keep booing the guy that brought the first Mens Hockey Gold Medal on home soil to you. Please. Get chants like "Crosby Sucks" going in the Bell Centre. Boo him whenever he touches the puck. He loves it...

Et les fans des Penguins de vous en seront reconnaissants. Bitches.

Go Pens!

Mercury Retrograde, An Explanation

Mercury: The Planet, its not usually this evil.

I'm superstitious.

If you know me, you also know that I believe in astrology. So seeing me start a new job during a Mercury Retrograde, though precedented, is probably surprising.

The last job I started during a Mercury Retrograde was at New York-New York Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. It was a great job, I enjoyed the work I did but the supervisory position I was supposed to be groomed for ended up getting eliminated due to the economic downturn, my department was merged with Yield Revenue and my job responsibilities got completely redefined. Not that I disagreed or could help anything that happened at NYNY, it just wasn't at all what I expected.

With that in mind, when my new position here in Pittsburgh was offered to me recently, it made me pause. I have past experience going against my belief of starting anything during a Mercury Retrograde. I was next to desperate in my current job and really wanted a new, fresh start. Also the new property seemed to be almost too good to be true...

And you know what they say... it probably is.

My first few days have been great but I can't help but wonder how long will it last. During a Mercury Retrograde, everything is definitely not as it seems.

For anyone that's ever heard me talk about Mercury's Retrograde before and thought that I was insane, I found a perfect explanation of the phenomenon in Part 3, Chapter 12, page 187 of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Astrology, 4th Edition. Below is Madeline Gerwick-Brodeur and Lisa Lenard's explanation of Mercury's Retrograde and why it would drive people like me and those I work with totally bonkers.

Mercury Retrograde: Crossed Wires
The purpose of Mercury retrograde is to encourage us to back up and catch up, to redo things that didn't get done the first time-or were done incorrectly-instead of constantly pushing forward. But it also can mean that expression becomes difficult, that we have trouble communicating through words or, worse, through other methods of communication, like e-mail or telephones.

During Mercury retrograde, Mercury is at its closest to Earth. This is its most intense position; because this energy is 'in our face,' we're forced to deal with things we've glossed over, forgotten, or done wrong. Retrograde Mercury is not 'bad' or 'good'; its a change in Mercury's energy. Being aware of it can help you avoid costly mistakes or unnecessary misunderstandings.

Transiting Mercury Retrograde
Because it's the ruler of transportation, when Mercury is retrograde, there are more car breakdowns, traffic mess-ups, and airline delays, and travel often has some unexpected and unpleasant surprises. Rental cars might not be ready or available, or hotel reservations might not have been made or kept. Your baggage might not even show up.

Transiting Mercury retrograde occurs three times every year for about 3 weeks each time, affecting everyone. This can signal everything from software and computer problems to packages not arriving. In projects requiring communication, signals can seem 'crossed,' or misunderstandings can occur, and there can be missed appointments and schedule delays as well.

But look on the bright side! Transiting Mercury retrograde gives us 3 weeks, three times a year, to go back to projects and situations so we can finish or redo them. Retrogrades always indicate the need to complete or return to something to improve upon the original work. These times are great opportunities to change or correct things you missed. And because you know transiting Mercury retrograde affects communication and transportation, take the extra effort to confirm appointments, project details, and travel plans.

It's a sticky business. If you're hyper sensitive to your surroundings like I am, you've probably felt it over the past few weeks. Its a sort of, "Something's Off" feeling that you can't quite put your finger on.

You're not going crazy, its Mercury's Retrograde.

If you've lost emails, had your texts go crazy or got frustrated because FourSquare's been down, its not a coincidence, its Mercury Retrograde. If someone from your past has reached out to you lately, its Mercury Retrograde. If your bank over drafted you for no reason, its Mercury Retrograde. If you've been arguing with a partner or significant other a lot lately, it's Mercury Retrograde.

Click here for an article on how each Sign responds to retrograde Mercury.

And here to read an article about Love Dos and Don'ts during Mercury's retrograde period.

Clean Up on Aisle Deux.

I had to work through the game tonight so my "pseudo-half-assed-recap" is going to be "fully-non-existent." With that in mind, I'd like to share my favorite part of Pens/Habs 2010 Stanley Cup Playoffs Game 1:

ASPEN DENTAL'S: The Play that Made Me Smile

From what I've heard, it sounds like Jaro isn't exactly the superhuman, god-like goaltender that Les Habitants were touting him to be since the Caps started golfing on 4/28. I hope Halak enjoyed being a God for 48hrs. If he's lucky, he'll be able to ride the coattails of Versus crack (addict) commentating staff that claimed he was "tired from the series with Washington."

Meanwhile, Craig Adams was quoted as saying, "I've scored twice in something like 105 games... the 2nd one was against Halak. We're good, thanks."

On another Penguins related note, my new jersey's record is now 2-0 and made its first appearance on East Carson tonight. It rightfully got the attention I feel it deserved. Drunk guys yelling "Hey Bob Errey! Hey that girl's wearing an Errey jersey. Hey Errey!" at me is a good homage to the Bibster.

Ditto the guys who stopped me on the way back to the car demanding to know who's name was on the back of my number 12 throwback. I turned around to proudly display the ERREY on the back, thinking to myself, "Who the fuck else would it be?"

It didn't dawn on me until 5 minutes later when I saw some dumb Pitt student wearing a Ryan Malone shersey why these two jagoffs would be so inquisitive... they were trying to monitor exactly how big, if any, a jersey foul I was committing.

So, with that in mind, I did what any other totally sober Pens fan would do tonight on East Carson. I yelled out my car window.

"Hey dude! Ryan Malone didn't make the playoffs!"

I live for the "WTF?" looks I get from random people on the South Side.